Saul: Good morning, Steve. Thank you for your message of inquiry which I will now answer fully for you. However, remember, a person is not always ready to hear the answer to the question that he asks at the time that he asks it, as you are undoubtedly well aware.
So, be patient with yourself, and accept yourself lovingly just as you see yourself in this moment. Release all negative self-judgments, they are just egoic distractions offering insoluble problems for you to attempt to resolve.
The human collective is presently dealing with the enormous task of releasing eons worth of “core issues” individually. Issues of hatred, bitterness, resentment, jealousy, judgment, and blame to which it has individually been clinging as it has DEMANDED divine restitution and damages for its personal suffering. Engaging with others in their suffering is not helpful. Intending to send Love to them is enormously helpful and effective.
And these issues, as they arise all across the world, are leading to conflicts at all levels of human society – personal one on one, family, religious and political institutions, various ethnic groups, divisions between people of the same nationality, and nation to nation – but all suffering is a direct result of following the “guidance” of the ego. Egos club together to address issues and end up in conflict with each other. Egos delight in conflict. Everyone has enjoyed seeing the pain or suffering of one that they have – even quietly, secretly and with hidden or unacknowledged personal shame – judged as deserving of punishment, and felt satisfaction that their judgment has therefore been proved right!
The problems of humanity are insoluble. In fact they are non existent! There are only individual problems. Individual problems can and will be resolved when the individual chooses to ignore and not respond to egoic guidance, and instead opens to Love. This generally does not happen all at once. The intention is set and then repeated at least daily, and as the intention becomes firmly established it starts to be acted on.
This is done by accepting that every human, however far anyone one sees or knows seems to have strayed from it in one’s own personal view, is on a spiritual path, and is truly doing their best. Everyone believes that he or she is doing his or her best, even if they are not doing very well. Everyone is to some extent in denial, it’s part of the separation experience, and it is a person’s core issues that are denied because they are both extremely painful and shame-filled.
The separation experience is shame-filled because it is a locking out or refusal to acknowledge God’s infinite Love for every one of His beloved children. It is a rejection of God, but is seen as a rejection by Him. For a better understanding you can compare it to the anger, resentment, and rejection that young adolescents project onto their parents as they grow up and learn to become independent of them. And of course vast numbers of children, have over the eons, been severely abused.
The parents very frequently react angrily and judgmentally to these behaviors because they have always felt a sense of inadequacy in their child-rearing abilities, and it seems to them that their children are now calling them on this, which they likely are, and do not realize that it is a necessary part of the children’s growth into adult maturity. Then later, when the children do mature and when the parents have had time to think about their parenting behaviors and recognize that the children, in spite of everything, have indeed become mature adults with their own valid way of living their human lives, acceptance between the generations occurs, reinforcing the love that has always been there.
The only way out of this self-reinforcing and extremely painful recurring and seemingly infinite loop of conflict and disagreement, which is like following a path along a möbius strip, is to break it by releasing all judgment of self and others – judgment of others is mostly projection of one’s own unacknowledged or denied shameful thoughts, words, or actions – and forgiving and accepting oneself and others unconditionally, then Love flows in. You do not have to do anything, you just need to allow whatever is arising to be what it is. Instead of judging self or others, see through the egoic mask presented, and intend to see and respond to the Christed Self, the Real Self, that resides permanently within each one of you.
Most people live with a sense of personal inadequacy because, as well as judging themselves inadequate, they compare themselves to others who have good egoic fronts or masks that they present to the world. But you are you and you have no choice but to live with that, and to do that adequately you must accept yourself just as you are. Who you are as a human, with all the flaws or inadequacies that you judge yourself to have, is a choice you made in order to be presented with lessons that you wished to learn.
And of course others with whom you are closely involved are assisting you in this, and you are, in turn, assisting them. Humans are on a cooperative path to awakening. If you choose to work alone, without cooperating – whatever the reason you may use to justify doing this – you are choosing not to awaken at this moment and shutting out or hiding from the Love that is waiting with infinite patience to flow into you when you will allow It.
Judging yourself as in any way unworthy of Love is a choice you make to hide from It, and that then seems to confirm for you the rightness of your sense of unworthiness, and so you do not feel Love’s Presence, although It is always with you. You have to let go of all negative self-judgment and allow, or, if you prefer, surrender to the Love that is always there for you.
Because you have judged yourself so negatively for so long it has become very ingrained within you – especially if you have said or done things to prove the rightness of that judgment – and so it is difficult at first to surrender into the Love instead of hiding from it in shame at your firm belief in your unchanging unworthiness. It seems that nothing you do changes the situation. And that, of course, is true. You cannot change the situation because there is no situation to change, there is only Love, and it is You.
What you can change are your beliefs, and the behaviors and attitudes that flow from them. Your beliefs are of the ego. Love has no beliefs, It knows, and what It knows is Itself, which is Reality.
So to conclude, dear Steve, intend in every moment to accept yourself just as you are, without trying to reason out how to do that, and ask yourself: “if God Loves me unconditionally, as He surely does, is it not rather sulky of me not to do the same?” 🙂 You are fine, you are Love ACCEPT that truth, and offer It to everyone, especially yourself, then choose and intend to feel It. It is delicate, gentle, peaceful, undemanding, soft, and welcoming. Return Its welcome.
Sending you an abundance of Love, Saul.